In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
