Having a random hookup so left but love u
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
