Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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