do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
My feet surprised me
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