I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
