David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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