Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
