Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(763): View more from Minnesota

My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Someone shit on the floor

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(905): View more from Toronto

FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home

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(915): View more from Texas

do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

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(802): View more from Vermont

I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories

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(201): View more from New Jersey

No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky

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(612): View more from Minnesota

not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class

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