fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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