I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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