He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
