Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
