The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
