he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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