saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Green mimosas i think yes
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
