I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
