I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
