i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
