he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
