Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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