Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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