Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
