Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i just had sex bonerless
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I want a musical about memes.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
