he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
