I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize