How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
