I'm eating all of the evidence.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
