the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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