Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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