how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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