I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
