i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize