As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
