I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
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