But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
