Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
