whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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