he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
