Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Gay?
German.
Pity.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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