She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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