Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize