we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
