i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
