I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
