I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You may now shotgun with the bride
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
