hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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