Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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