I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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