dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Small penises have feelings too.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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