Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
