Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
