You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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